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Title: Instinct
Series: 너를 기억해 / Hello Monster
Characters: Lee Hyeon, mentions of Cha Jian
Summary: Perhaps he should just trust his instinct rather than thinking too much.
----------------------------
You could say that he somewhat regretted it. For not really having the courage to surpass that wall, and just went on with it. But then, during those times... he had some others things that he needed to prioritize upon. Like trying to find Min, keeping Min safe, trying to keep her safe, trying to get that person behind bars...
But it was not as if he hadn't come close. He did kissed her... on the forehead. Because at that point he had a new-found respect for her; the person that despite so much hardship that fell on her... she managed to remain strong. That despite the fact she barely escaped a life-threatening situation and wasn't in her strongest state, she was still able to worry for him and tried to comfort him.
She was the one who kissed him first, and he hasn't been able to reciprocate that gesture back to tell her that his feelings for her was mutual. Sure, he already said it to her in his own words on how he felt about her. But there was something different between telling someone that you loved them so much and actually showing that feeling to her directly.
But suppose, a part of him was scared. For taking things too quickly or rash... or taking things too slow. Thus this past year was a complete torture. He was stuck between wanting to keep Min by his side, yet yearning for that someone that was the most closest inside his heart.
And a part of him was scared that she would push him away after his long absence.
xxx
"So are you going back to the team?"
Hyeon turned towards her as Jian looked up towards him, unsure.
"Because if you are, it's better you do it now and disappear forever."
His heart ached as he heard those words. Just imagining to part away from her was unbearable, let alone forever. How could he possibly do that to her? To himself?
"No," he said.
He could see that she was relieved to hear that. "I'll give you some slack," she responded in return. Hyeon smiled.
"I missed you."
He needed to say it. Even if he couldn't tell her about what truly happened to Min yet. Because he needed to tell her that she wasn't the only one who was suffering. That during the past year, he also... dreadfully misses her a lot. It seemed a trivial thing to say, but it was important to him to let her know.
Jian nodded.
"Very much."
She nodded even more, as Hyeon could see that she was trying so hard to not show that she was really pleased to hear that he missed him. But immediately he could not contain his longing even more as he embraced her. His heart soared the moment he held her close. It made him realized how badly he missed her for the past year, how much he wanted to feel her close. To bask in her warmth, to hear her voice.
Hyeon pulled away as he gazed at her, and wondered how should he proceed. Jian was patiently waiting for him to make a move as his eyes kept darting between her eyes and lips. But then he put caution to the wind and leaned over to kiss her.
It was silly, he thought as he lingered for a moment and pulled away. Jian looked up to him shyly as both of them chuckled nervously. It was just a simple thing yet he was so nervous. To do it right, properly... to not seemed so foolish.
But perhaps he shouldn't over-think things so much and just rely on instincts, Hyeon thought as he leaned again to kiss Jian deeply.
Series: 너를 기억해 / Hello Monster
Characters: Lee Hyeon, mentions of Cha Jian
Summary: Perhaps he should just trust his instinct rather than thinking too much.
----------------------------
You could say that he somewhat regretted it. For not really having the courage to surpass that wall, and just went on with it. But then, during those times... he had some others things that he needed to prioritize upon. Like trying to find Min, keeping Min safe, trying to keep her safe, trying to get that person behind bars...
But it was not as if he hadn't come close. He did kissed her... on the forehead. Because at that point he had a new-found respect for her; the person that despite so much hardship that fell on her... she managed to remain strong. That despite the fact she barely escaped a life-threatening situation and wasn't in her strongest state, she was still able to worry for him and tried to comfort him.
She was the one who kissed him first, and he hasn't been able to reciprocate that gesture back to tell her that his feelings for her was mutual. Sure, he already said it to her in his own words on how he felt about her. But there was something different between telling someone that you loved them so much and actually showing that feeling to her directly.
But suppose, a part of him was scared. For taking things too quickly or rash... or taking things too slow. Thus this past year was a complete torture. He was stuck between wanting to keep Min by his side, yet yearning for that someone that was the most closest inside his heart.
And a part of him was scared that she would push him away after his long absence.
xxx
"So are you going back to the team?"
Hyeon turned towards her as Jian looked up towards him, unsure.
"Because if you are, it's better you do it now and disappear forever."
His heart ached as he heard those words. Just imagining to part away from her was unbearable, let alone forever. How could he possibly do that to her? To himself?
"No," he said.
He could see that she was relieved to hear that. "I'll give you some slack," she responded in return. Hyeon smiled.
"I missed you."
He needed to say it. Even if he couldn't tell her about what truly happened to Min yet. Because he needed to tell her that she wasn't the only one who was suffering. That during the past year, he also... dreadfully misses her a lot. It seemed a trivial thing to say, but it was important to him to let her know.
Jian nodded.
"Very much."
She nodded even more, as Hyeon could see that she was trying so hard to not show that she was really pleased to hear that he missed him. But immediately he could not contain his longing even more as he embraced her. His heart soared the moment he held her close. It made him realized how badly he missed her for the past year, how much he wanted to feel her close. To bask in her warmth, to hear her voice.
Hyeon pulled away as he gazed at her, and wondered how should he proceed. Jian was patiently waiting for him to make a move as his eyes kept darting between her eyes and lips. But then he put caution to the wind and leaned over to kiss her.
It was silly, he thought as he lingered for a moment and pulled away. Jian looked up to him shyly as both of them chuckled nervously. It was just a simple thing yet he was so nervous. To do it right, properly... to not seemed so foolish.
But perhaps he shouldn't over-think things so much and just rely on instincts, Hyeon thought as he leaned again to kiss Jian deeply.
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